Grammie

I have not blogged in months, but something really big happened last month that is forefront in my thoughts. On October 28th at 91 years young Grammie, my mom's mom, went to be with Jesus.

This summer Grammie had major surgery to remove a cancerous mass. The surgery was intense, but like so many times before, Grammie rallied like a champ and was back out and about post-op. When my sister Sarah and her hubby Justin went down to Aiken, SC to visit Grammie and Grandy and our Aiken family, she was going out with them. Sarah caught this incredible picture of Grammie during that visit. Now I know where I get that sweet tooth from! (And who cares about portion control! Right, Grammie?!)

We all heard that post-operation that the cancer had come back, but because Grammie rallied so well, we began to think that it was slow-moving, and that there would be more time. I was mentally planning that Jody and I could make a trip down to South Carolina sometime in the spring. After all, Jody has not been to Aiken yet.

But then my sister Sarah called me on Tuesday, October 21 to tell me that Grammie had gone to the doctor. There, Grammie learned that the cancer had come back. In just a few months a new mass had grown larger than the one the doctors removed a few months ago. There was nothing they could do. Mommy drove down to South Carolina immediately, and I booked a ticket for Friday, the 24th. I'm so glad I did.

Grandy and Mommy picked me up at the Augusta Airport, and I got to spend Friday through Tuesday with Grammie and everyone right at Grammie and Grandy's home. Though weak, Grammie - ever the extroverted social butterfly - loved having all the people in the house. It was a party! My cousins Betsy and Laura came with their kids, so we got to see some Halloween costumes on display. Even Laura's dog Gizzie was a "Rufferee" for the holiday. Hilarious! It was my first time seeing both of Betsy's kids. Caroline was 18 months, and little Patrick couldn't have been more than 2 or 3 months old, so poor Betsy and Jeffrey were quite swamped with their little ones. Nonetheless, it was a joy to see my cousins and their families despite the sadness of the occasion.

It was so precious for me to be able to see Grammie all the time, since she was at the house and not at the hospital. We could all pop in and out of the front room to see her, say good morning or goodnight. I will never forget taking communion on Sunday as a family around her bed. Or all the wonderful conversations with all my various family members over the course of those few days.

I loved being near Grandy, too. My wonderful grandfather would come into my bedroom around 8AM and wake me up, telling me that breakfast was almost ready. :) I'd shower and get myself together and then walk into the kitchen, where he had set out a lovely little breakfast spread. We'd chat over our breakfast meal. Sometimes Mom would join us. It was a treasured time. I miss you, Grandy!!

Uncle Peter and Aunt Lynn took us down the street where they are building their home. The floorplan is on the same site as the house that Lynn grew up in. It was incredible to see, and I'm already hoping we can reserve a room for a visit! :) We also got to give Grammie a virtual tour of the house. Scott took his phone through, and I held Mom's iPad so Grammie could see it all. It was so great!

And then Mommy took me on a walk down memory lane. Aiken, SC is horse country, as many articles express in glowing terms (like this one here). Just a few streets from her house are the incredible homes of the wealthy in Aiken, the polo field, the jump and dressage arenas, the dirt streets where the equestrian community walks and stables their horses, and so many beautiful horses out in the paddocks. Mommy showed me where she used to hang out and watch the horses just like she showed me in this picture. I can just imagine her as a little girl, climbing on the fence or up the magnolia trees to see the wealthy socialites playing polo. So fun!

My Aunt Lynn took me to downtown Aiken and to St. Thaddeus to see Grammie and Grandy's church. This is where my mom and dad were married in 1977, and this is where Grammie is now buried. A beautiful church. I got to walk through the cemetery and see the work that Grandy has done for many, many years, overseeing the finances for the care of the beautiful bit of land. It was so peaceful. Well done, Grandy. Well, done.

Several of my own siblings came. I got to see Rebekah and Bryan, Daniel and Courtney, Luke, Nate and Anna. The last time I got to see them was at Nate and Anna's wedding last December. Has it really been that long? I FaceTimed with Daddy and Josh and Sarah and Justin, and I know Chris FaceTimed in, as well. Amidst the sadness of the trip, I treasured every moment of getting to see my family. How I miss and love them! 

The hardest part of this trip to Aiken was knowing it was going to end and that Grammie was leaving us. She was so strong to the end, full of peace and joy. I could not help but marvel at her. Four hours after I left their house in Aiken, and while I was waiting in the Charlotte airport to board my flight for Milwaukee, Grammie went to be with Jesus. It was Tuesday, October 28th in the evening, and she was surrounded by family who love her so much. She was 91 years old and had been married to Grandy for 68 years. But - most importantly - she had put her faith and trust in Jesus Christ for salvation and knew that the best is yet to come. What an incredible woman.

Grammie & Grandy w/ their 3 kids (L-R) Kathy, Mom, Pete

I'm going to miss you, Grammie. So grateful for your example of love, faithfulness and courage. And I cannot wait to see you again. I hold fast to the promise that this life is but a breath, and eternity is ahead. So very grateful for this hope!

Though our bodies are dying, our spirits are being renewed every day. For our present troubles are small and won’t last very long. Yet they produce for us a glory that vastly outweighs them and will last forever! So we don’t look at the troubles we can see now; rather, we fix our gaze on things that cannot be seen. For the things we see now will soon be gone, but the things we cannot see will last forever.

2 Corinthians 4:16-18

5 Years of Adventure!

“Adventure is just a romantic name for trouble. It sounds swell when you write about it, but it's hell when you meet it face to face in a dark and lonely place.” ― Louis L'Amour

This August Jo and I celebrated a milestone in the Been Family: Five years of wedded bliss. Or, as we like to say it, ADVENTURE!

The story of how Jody and I met is a unique one. A story that we always love to share, because we feel it shows the power and imagination of our God. And, when we step back ourselves and really think about our story, we also shake our heads and marvel at God's goodness in bringing us together.

Jody and I actually "met" (or, at least, first connected) via MySpace. 

Yep. I don't usually share that part of the story... 

But I will go ahead and share the story in its' entirety here, because it's just that good. :) 

I opened a MySpace account in 2006 while I was in Korea so that I could stay in touch with my younger sisters, who were quickly growing up while I was out of the country. They instructed me via Skype how to set up the account, and I began to learn about the beautiful world of social networking.

I then began receiving MySpace emails from people I didn't know from all over the world - but specifically from the States - asking me how I got the job teaching ESL in Korea. This wasn't totally abnormal since I'd started my blog the year before, and people would happen upon it and email me to find out more how I got my cool job (because teaching at ERC was a pretty cool job!). :) Usually I would respond with a kind and informative but very impersonal email. 

[This was maybe in May 2006.] So, I got this MySpace email from this dude in Texas asking me how I got my job. I went to his MySpace page, saw some wacky "profile pictures," decided he was weird and so answered his questions politely but impersonally and hit 'Send.' And that was that. 

Fast forward a few months. 

August 2006 - I go home at the end of my 1 year contract. My sister has my niece Chloe... and I definitely didn't want to miss that!

September 2006 - I return to Korea. End up at my friends' Stefanie and Brittany's apartment, weeping and wailing about returning to Korea. Why did I return?! I don't like Korea!

October 6th (or 8th? I can't remember!), 2006 - I go to Stefanie and Brittany's place for the weekly Friday night foreigners' gathering for pizza and a movie. I meet this tall, skinny, funny guy who's a new teacher at the church/school in Suji. His name is Jody Been. We walk home together... And, lo and behold, his apartment is in the same complex as mine. In fact, he lives only four or five apartment buildings from mine. 

The next night - I get a knock on my door. The guy I met the night before, Jody Been, is at my apartment door. He says, "I know you. You're the gal I emailed on MySpace a few months ago...."

Whaaaaat?

And so it began. Jody and I began to spend time together. He started going to the Korean church I was going to. I was so thankful for a Western friend - one who spoke English, loved Jesus and (yes, I'll admit it) was decidedly Western in his mindset.

Mid-December 2006 - After hours and hours of hanging out, late night walks to the high point in Suji, midnight runs to Lotte Mart, weekend adventures at Joyful Church, and our regular Friday night gatherings with all our friends at Britt's and Stef's place, Jo and I decide to date. This picture of us is the very first one of us... from when we were still friends. :)

December 31, 2006 - I return from a ~10 day trip spending Christmas with friends near Dresden, Germany. Missed Jody like crazy while I was there. That night, we had our first talk of marriage. Jody brings me flowers. :) 

March 9, 2007 - Jody proposes at my apartment in Suji. I say 'yes' of course, though you should ask Jody to tell you the story of the proposal sometime. He would say that I didn't really give him a response. Ha ha! 

August 25, 2007 - We establish the covenant of marriage at West End Assembly of God in Richmond, VA before our family and friends. 

We started our marriage with adventure - backpacking in Eastern Europe for a month.... 

But that is a story I will save for my next post.

Needless to say, life with Jody has been such an adventure. I am so grateful and thankful for five sweet years of marriage to this man.

I love you, Jody Been!

Bittersweet Goodbyes

Three and a half years ago, Jody and I first moved to Colorado and began to prepare for the arduous task of completing a degree at Denver Seminary. And though I was born in Colorado and spent the first few years of my life here, it is a completely different experience as an adult, forging your own way 'in the world' and establishing lasting friendships out of nothing.

We moved to Littleton after returning to the States from Korea, spending two months with my family in Virginia and two months with Jo's family in Texas. It was so nice to finally settle down. I changed my name officially to 'Been,' updated my license to an official Colorado one, got our plates registered. Every little piece made us feel more at home. Still, we knew no one. No church home. No connections other than my parents' friends from when they lived here back in the 70s and 80s. 

After using the first few weeks of our time in Colorado to adjust, it was time for Jo to get everything prepared for his first semester of graduate school. He registered for classes and got his books. The next step to preparing for school was to attend the New Student Orientation.

The day of, we drove to the seminary, parked and walked into the building that houses the chapel. There were round tables throughout the room, and so we picked our seats off to the southern side and began to chat with those around us. Then we noticed a couple walk in, and there wasn't a place for them to sit at any of the tables.

I remember it - as clear as day. "Hey, come join us!" Jody and I urged them.

We pulled up a few chairs next to us, and they sat down.

Three and a half years later, I miss them like crazy.

Sam and Britt became our buds all through seminary. California natives, from Day #1 I knew they would be returning to their beloved state. I just knew it was inevitable. But I still am so thankful for the time that we had together!

Their wiener dog Rustie convinced me that I wanted a miniature dachshund for myself. They went with us out to the home in Elizabeth where we picked up Eu-mi as an 8 week old pup from a litter of eight.

We had doggie play dates.

Worked out together.

Ate meals together composed of whatever was in our refrigerators at the time.

"You have carrots? Oh, great! I'll bring the lettuce and tomatoes."

"Game night? Sweet! I'll bring Settlers. Wanna bake some of your amazing cookies?"

We discussed the stresses of seminary together. Its' effect on our health, our marriages, our finances. Oh, what a blessing to have someone who could relate!

We played outside together... had snowball fights. Went biking in the mountains.

When they got another pup, Roxy, Jo and I decided that we'd need to get another wiener dog, too! I mean, imagine the play dates with not two - BUT FOUR - wiener dogs!

Yup! All 4 of them!

Even when Britt and I were working, Sam and Jo were always up to some mischief. Brewing beer. Debating Calvinism vs. Arminianism. Talking about life in ministry.

When Jo graduated in December, Sam and Britt were there to celebrate with us.

It just wouldn't have been the same without them.

I used to think that 'bosom friends' (as Anne Shirley puts it) were impossible to find. Now I know that they're not impossible to find... but they are rare and to be treasured.

Sam got a job at a church in northern California, and they moved last month. Before they left, they came over and dropped off all the food in their pantry.

Because that's what friends do.

We got take-out Panda Express, sat in the living room and talked about the future. And how they need to find us a job in California, so we can keep hanging out.

Dear Parsons,
We are so grateful for you guys. 
We miss and love you so much, and we pray God's blessings on your lives. 
Keep a room open for us in Cali! We just might have to come visit!!
Love,
The Beens

entry from a few years ago... haha...

Monday, September 18, 2006

So a little over a week ago I returned to Korea after spending two weeks at home. It was a marvelous trip in all, and I thoroughly enjoyed seeing family and friends and just being back in the good ol' US of A.

Whoever says that America sucks has probably not spent a year in Korea.

Now, when I say this, I mean it with no animosity towards Korea. I have met some amazing people here, and they have showered me with kindness and generosity. God has indeed been good to me here. He has taught me a lot about what it means to live overseas, and to operate in a country where I cannot speak the language, and where I stand out like a sore thumb. And even where (in their eyes) I am on the same level as Brooke Shields.

However, there are enough cultural differences to show you that you are not in Kansas anymore, and even though you have met Tinman and all sorts of wonderful people along the way, in the end, there really is no place like home.

And so now I am commencing on month 13 (of 18.5), and I am seeking God's plans for me in the next 6 months and what I'll be doing post-Korea... Prayers are appreciated!

Stef's Visit

Last week was a very exciting time, because my dear friend, Stefanie came to visit me and Jody. Now why is Stefanie so special, do you ask? Stefanie is special for more reasons that I can think of, but the first that comes to mind is that Stefanie has seen me struggle over several years and she still loves me. Stefanie was one of my first friends in Korea. We met in early 2006 at an English ministry of a large church in Migeum station, about 15 minutes drive from Suji, where we both lived.

As I thought about our history, I realized we have been through a lot together and kept in touch even when apart. (Move your mouse over the following paragraph, and you will be able to click on the links to see when I wrote about those experiences on this blog.) 

We were friends when Korea was crazy over the World Cup. She encouraged me when I arrived back in Korea for my second year and cried like a baby in her and Brittany's apartment. She was there when Jody and I first met and became friends... and when we went hiking together... and the shirt I'm wearing for my first 'date' with Jody is hers.... Stefanie is also the first person I told when Jody had proposed... we were, after all, heading over to her apartment that Friday evening when Jo popped the question. :) Stefanie was a consolation during our Tuesday night Bible studies, where we confessed struggles, prayed for one another and encouraged each other to keep pressing on. She was there the day of our wedding... and back in Korea when we returned to Korea for my third year. She has celebrated Thanksgiving with me in Korea. She introduced us to Life Church, where we had community and developed wonderful friendships with amazing people. I praise God for Stefanie!

And so, last Tuesday, Stefanie came to Denver and visited Jody and me. Sadly, Jody received a jury summons - and was selected. So he was gone most of Stefanie's visit (bummer!!!), but nonetheless, we girls had a great time together. We ate Korean food together, took a walk to downtown Littleton, visited Garden of the Gods in Colorado Springs, and visited the Coors Brewery in Golden. It was a wonderful time together, and I praise God for faithful friends like Stef.

i love you, steffers!

9:42pm

so i just found out from mrs. kim that our school is not doing a winter program. Hallelujah.. halle - hallelujah! LOL.

however, a few new students have joined my classes for the month of vacation, so i may have to divide the classes by ability... we'll see how it all pans out. anyway, i'm SO thankful that mrs. kim didn't succumb to the societal pressure to have a winter program just so that our hogwan looks like we're a happenin' place.

10:00 am

the other night on the subway with lauren i began thinking aloud... why is it that some people face struggles and they overcome, while others crumble? part of it could be the nature of the struggle itself. or is it the character of the individual?

the reason for these thoughts is twofold. my freshman year of college i took my first ESL course, during which i was required to research ESL in a certain country and prepare a 10 week sample lesson plan. i chose south korea. since ESL is a new field, one of the few places to find resources is on the web, but when i began looking i found perfect horror stories from teachers who came to korea. i did my research, prepared my lesson plans and presented my tri-fold board to my professor, but i had pretty much made up my mind that i would never teach ESL in south korea. LOL. you have to admit, the Lord does have a sense of humor.

since coming here, however, i have seen a mixed bag of experiences. some love it, some have very nebulous feelings and aren't sure if they want to stay longer, and still others (a fair number, actually) don't even make it through their 12 month contract. why is that?

and the other part (remember, i had two reasons.) was when i saw the Lion, the witch, and the wardrobe on new year's eve. i thought a lot about the children's individual attitudes and the way they responded to the repercussions of their father at war as a reflection of their personal character. lucy had that wonderful childlike faith, but edmond was sullen and chose to take offense at everything. in comparing that to korea, it would be very easy for a westerner to look down on korean ways of life. even to be sullen at being bound to this culture while living and working here under contract. and while i understand completely some of the cultural challenges being difficult, i do not want to have the edmond-like character qualities in facing those differences.

so all these thoughts were in my head as i went to church yesterday morning. pastor bob spoke from joshua 1.

5"No man will be able to stand before you all the days of your life Just as I have been with Moses, I will be with you; I will not fail you or forsake you. 6"Be strong and courageous, for you shall give this people possession of the land which I swore to their fathers to give them. 7"Only be strong and very courageous; be careful to do according to all the law which Moses My servant commanded you; do not turn from it to the right or to the left, so that you may have success wherever you go. 8"This book of the law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do according to all that is written in it; for then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have success. 9"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous! Do not tremble or be dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go."

i am reminded to take heart and be strong and courageous here in korea. to take heart and to spend more time meditating on the Word. i love the conditionality of God's promises. (ok, so it's a slight digression, but bear with me: God is incredibly logical. if you repent, I will forgive you. if you read my Word and do what it says, I will bless your life. incredibly logical. i love it! everything makes such sense!!) anyway, pastor bob also spoke on numbers 13, which narrates the story of the 12 spies who reported to moses and the people of israel on what they'd seen in the land "flowing with mild and honey." only joshua and caleb spoke with courage: we can overcome these people! the other ten did not believe.... and so did not see the Promised Land. only joshua and caleb lived to see their people subdue the land and live there.

may i not be like the other ten, who did not have faith, but to be like joshua and caleb (whose name, btw, means "bold")... please pray for me to have eyes and a heart of faith while i am here in korea, that i would grow in all the ways the Lord desires and that i would have an overcoming spirit. and please pray that my times with the Lord would be incredibly rich with His presence and His Spirit.

thank you!!!

today i start back at teaching. bummer. LOL.

CANDY!

Amy has a long tongue.

They were having a blast with their fruit rollups in class yesterday, and I couldn't help but remember my elementary school days when fruit roll-ups were by far the coolest treat you could bring in your lunchbox. The only time I had one was when I exchanged something else far more healthy. Oh, but it was hoarded and treasured all day long!